As I'm supervising my Ma wrap presents I overhear a familiar noise of treat wrappers. Thinking there is a surprise picnic just for me about to begin, I go to check it out and I am delighted to see a beautiful array of yummy-goodness treats and crunch bones!
I jump on the bed, I'm stoked, and I prepare to begin my much deserved feast. Obviously Mamma has noticed how starving I was and I must admit, I was very very well behaved today.
Just then My delight turns to horror as Ma tells me these are not for me but they are "Christmas presents" for all my stupid dog friends. She has even tied little stupid bows around them and I have to give them as gifts to my stupid cousin dogs, and my stupid boyfriend dog. Hmph.
Even though I was fuming with anger and disappointment I decided to behave as I plot my revenge. Ma gave me a treat or two while I stared at her but I was not satisfied so I stole a little stocking stuffer bear. I plan on enjoying the shit out of it. It has no squeaker prize in it but it does sing a dumb reindeer song, and before the night is over I will have killed it. Right now I am simultaneously chewing on the musical bear and my crunch bone. That's right, at the same time!
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